Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Randomize
