brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
I would fuck him just for his dog
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Randomize
