Bisexual people are plain selfish.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
