I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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