There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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