"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
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Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
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Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
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