alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
I cartwheeled across every street... They tried to stop me but I bit anyone who came near me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize