she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
Randomize
