he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
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