it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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