Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
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