if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
Randomize
