I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
