but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
