oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
Two words: blizzard sex
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
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