just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
oh god was she eating orange peels again
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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