The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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