Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
