There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Randomize