I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
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