If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
I'm at McDonalds and when I walked up to the register the guy said "I'm so sorry." Before I said a word. That's how bad my hangover is.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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