Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
