So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
Randomize
