This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
Randomize
