great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
Randomize
