Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Randomize