thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Randomize
