Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
