I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Randomize
