If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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