how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
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