are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Randomize
