sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
Randomize
