So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize