Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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