..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Randomize
