Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
she told me i tasted like america
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
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