Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?