I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
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