Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
That moment during finals day when you either convince your teacher to let you out of the room or you shit you pants.
Randomize