Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
My butt remains clenched, sir.
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