i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
Randomize
