So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Randomize