C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
Randomize
