just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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