Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
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