I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
I think my vagina is haunted
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
You went into the bathroom, got in the tub with a pillow, yelled "this isn't as comfortable as it looks in the movies" then passed out
Randomize
