Your mouth is God's brothel.
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
