I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Randomize
