Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Randomize
